Growing too Fast!!!

I never realized how fast time seems to go by when you are a mother. Seems like just last month when he could fit in my lap no problem... now I have to open my legs so that he will at least have support on his neck! He is growing like a weed! He is so big! He looks much older than his age! At least that is what EVERYONE tells me! These are a few pictures from his new chair! It looks alot the same but has a nice head rest on it... and it is fitted to him more!

He is such a Happy Baby!!! I thank God for that! Even though he has all these challenges in his life that he has faced or is going to face, I hope that he can maintain his good attitude about life.

It has a nice foot rest for him. The other chair that we were borrowing had straps for his feet and I never liked the idea of strapping him down!!

His chair even has a really cool tray that just slides into place and he can use it like a desk. We put his toys up there right now but soon we are going to get him into coloring and finger painting! I can't wait!!! He is getting crayons (along with many other things) for Valentine's Day.

This is his toy that has a little bit of everything on it... but he thinks he is too big for it now cause he throws it as soon as you give it to him!!! But the bottle is one of his favorite toys right now... it has a few blocks in it and he can shake it and hear the noise!!!

We love to hold him and try to get him to sit on his butt since he isn't used to sitting up. But recently he has been such a wiggle worm that we have to sit on the floor and let him lean against us. I know this is a good thing and I am very thankful but I also worry about the future... will I be able to handle him then?? I hope so!!!

This picture really should be at the end cause I layed him down last, but he was rolling his legs and butt so much last night. He had an itch on his back and would kick off the couch and roll over on his side!! Mommy was so SO proud!!!

Here he is in my lap. I know it is hard to tell but he is... He has grown so much and he doesn't fit anymore! : (

And here is my Big 21 month old little boy! He sure did do alot for his Daddy and I! He made us grow up A LOT!!! And never have I had so many emotions about one person...We have had lots of good time, few bad times, and many scary times, but all-in-all, This is the love of my life! There will never be another one like him!

On a side note, not many people know how depressed I am. I really try to hide it! I am not depressed all the time, just when I let things get to me! The other night, I was in the shower and just a crying... Derek asked if I was ok later that night and I just broke down... All I ever wanted to be in life was a mommy... and I never wanted just one child (of my own)... and Baker was such an easy delivery. So being around people that have little babies or are pregnant is just hard on me sometime. I always dreamed of my little red headed children being filthy after picking them up at Becky's and not caring cause I knew that they were having a blast... and Baker can't even be around sand. We picked out the name Baker cause we thought it would sound good over the loud speaker when he was up to bat or was involved in the winning play of the game. Now it is a chore to get him to the games. I guess what I am saying is please pray for me... I know that God has bigger and better things in our lives other than having children. And I know that Baker is here in our lives for a reason... Just pray that God continue to bless Baker! And pray that we, as Baker's parents, are doing what we need to do to raise Baker the best way possible!!

I am trying to plan an Annual Batting with Baker Hit-a-thon for later this year to raise money for us to go meet other families of affected children and the extra will go to the Myotubular Myopathy research that is going on. But I am not good at getting things together. I have it in my head but actually doing it is going to be hard!!!